Tag: life

Thoughts upon this evening 

Carl Setzer

​It was lovely day, by my standards, at least. Yeah, a bit wet in the morning, but the afternoon turned out nice. Well, not pouring down. 

Got a walk in after lunch. Still haven’t made my 10,000 steps, though. Ah, my sedentary life! My fitbit drives me forward to a more active life. Helping me clear my mind, enabling me to focus better, to be more present, not all lost, in my head, dealing with some random element or another. 

Spent the evening talking with some friends, and the daughter of one of them. It was quite a charming hour. Reminded me of the “plan” all those many years ago to have a second child, ostensibly a daughter. 

I was struck, as I considered time, how intensely short it is from diapers to adulthood. Talking with this girl, it hits me that she’s existed only a tiny fraction of my life. And yet she’s clever, witty, bright and engaging. Full of ideas, knowledge and life. 

This is why I work so hard to be in the “now” of life. It’s so fleeting. This girl will soon be in middle school, driving, off to college. As will my son. It’s fleeting. I must savor this moment, as it will waft away, watched or not. Once gone, it’s dead. 

I see this as the ultimate manifestation of love. To be here, be aware of the now, fully engaged in this moment, with these people. Now. It’s all we got. 

Thought of the day

Carl Setzer

What’s done is done. Lesson learned, move forward.

I have a tendency to obsess over things where I was less than perfect. It’s rather destructive.

I’m learning to simply say “I can’t undo the past” and move along. Learning…not there yet.

Going forward. Feels like more of a challenge than it should be. I guess that means I have work to do.

Optimist’s failing  

Carl Setzer

​Others resting well

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My Journal 

Carl Setzer

​My Moleskine

My journal

My sanity

My refuge

Where I dump 

Life’s insanity  

Returning to 

Balance

Demands of Life

Carl Setzer

​Life’s demands come forth 

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Another evening haiku

Carl Setzer

​Frustrations arise

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A meditation on fear 

Carl Setzer2 Comments

Fear cannot be beat 
With fear’s heavy hammering
Only love will win

Growing Older or Life Goals

Carl Setzer

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While perusing images in Pinterest, I stumbled upon pictures of elderly couples deeply in love. That captures something I want for myself: being filled with love.

A few years ago, one of my mentors died. Sad, yes; but the community of adoration that surrounded him, that came together celebrating his life inspired me deeply. Gave me pause. What echoes do I want my life to leave?

In my early teens I faced my mother’s death from cancer, plus the murder/suicide of my best-friend’s parents. Mortality’s shadow followed my life since. My legacy a consideration, that’s always within my mind. Often laden with anxiety. When I learned to focus on love, I changed.

I seek to be surrounded love, reflecting compassionate warmth back. Affirming and growing all I touch, that’s a worthy life-goal methinks. A life filled with wonder, delight and laughter; the result of facing down my mortality. I’m content with the result.