Category: Personal Reflections

Lessons learned about life; pearls of wisdom I’ve gleaned through pain, failure and honest reflection

A Memorial Day From Hell

Carl Setzer
Viewing south from Harborview
Viewing to the south from Seattle’s Harborview hospital

An ICU Haiku:

At the very top
A view south of Seattle
The ICU’s noise

My family came home yesterday evening after a few days in Seattle’s Harborview hospital. This is the highest level trauma center for a good portion of the western US. My son’s skateboarding accident Monday afternoon resulted in a skull fracture, bleeding on his brain and a concussion. Hence our stay at a level 1 trauma center.

We’re home now, really just starting the long road of healing before us. It’s amazing to many of us how quickly we got here. A huge help: his helmet. The trauma was significantly mitigated by it. Several doctors and nurses told us it saved his life. Talk about sobering.

As we continue down this I will keep in mind how close we came to life altering calamity. When I feel frustrated about the caregiving, his surliness (a warning from the nurses)…all the elements of a head injury with months/years-long recovery, I will focus on how close we came to losing everything. I’m lucky: I brought my son home.

Waking in Terror While Resting in the ICU

Carl Setzer

How do I describe the feeling of bolting upright a little after 5am this morning with the first significant awareness of how serious this was. How badly this could’ve been. That we went right up to a line that, once crossed, you don’t come back from. It’s terrifying, sobering and humbling.

Braeden and Sheri are asleep. We’re moving forward. Very likely we’ll head home today. But this road is long. I feel deep gratitude that I won’t be alone.

Now I’m going to wipe away some tears, watch the sun rise, and embrace this sense of gratitude. And think about some breakfast.

Day 2 In The ICU

Carl Setzer

Braeden has been asleep most of the day, which has been helpful. When he’s awake he’s very aware of what’s going one and (roughly) where he is. His short term memory is a little fuzzy, so we’re repeating some things multiple times. He’s mostly his normal, pleasant self, and is ready to go home – most likely tomorrow.

We’ve been “discharged” from the pediatric ICU, though we haven’t had to change beds. We’re looking forward to being back home. Braeden is eager to get back to his normal life, though that will happen slower than he likes. Progress is being made. The staff at Swedish Edmonds and Harborview have been amazing.

Most importantly, we’ve felt upheld and deeply cared for by you, our community. We can’t thank you enough. All the prayers and well wishes are deeply felt. This ocean of love is amazing , and truly humbling. Our gratitude is immense. Thank you!

My Son’s Skateboard Accident, Or, A Trip To The ICU

Carl Setzer

Dear friends, sorry for impersonal update, but I wanted to get this out as quickly as possible. My son, Braeden, wiped out on his longboard yesterday and hit his head. He has a temporal skull fracture and had some bleeding in the lining. Stable at 4-hour repeat scan. We are currently in the PICU at Harborview. Hopefully moving to the floor some time today. Thankful he was wearing his helmet

Blooms

Carl Setzer
This guy is blooming in our garden

Within my garden
Springtime announced in glory
Soon the petals fall

AutoCAD Work

Carl Setzer

I’ve been having fun with CAD the past few days. I’ve taken this handsketched drawing and drawn it up in CAD. Yeah, I’m a nerd, but I find it fun.

 

AutoCAD Image 5-3-19.JPG

Friday night haiku for April 26, 2018

Carl Setzer

Staring down the road
Much potential before me
The newness of spring

Exploring Faith And Music

Carl Setzer

I love music that challenges me, pushes my understanding of what music, what it can convey. So I look forward to exploring this playlist. Let me know what you think.

 

 

Deserts Hate Me: A Tale Of Un-Tough Skin

Carl Setzer

Seattle’s winter taught me something new: deserts hate me. In the deepest cold of February, as the upper left coast shivered in a frigid, deeply embrace, my skin burned. Cracking, peeling, bleeding, the lack of moisture in the air brutalized me. Far more painful that I remember.

Over the years I dreamt of journeys through the Southwest. Wandering the desert canyons, a soundtrack featuring R. Carlos Nakai, perhaps tied to a writer’s retreat, I explore the zen within the arid land. Tranquility filling my soul.

Now I fear my skin crumbling off my bones. Needing to bathe in moisturizer. Not the most pleasant imagery.

Perhaps my mind exaggerates. It often plays such tricks on me. The dream still lingers. No harm, I guess, in holding that. Maybe the tranquility compensates for the damaged skin.

Such randomness within in my mind.

Unfamiliar with R. Carlos Nakai’s music? His native flute music carries me deep within, speaking to my depths.

 

From My Walk This Morning

Carl Setzer

Not far from my home
This plant bursting with spring’s life
Season’s transition